Have you ever felt this deep pain as if someone pierced your heart with a sword?

This is how I felt after the resolute rejection of my boyfriend Elikeh, the future alpha of my pack, the Moon Shine. Inseparable and deeply in love for over five years, we knew we weren't destined mates because neither of us felt the mate pull when we turned eighteen. We already knew that our mates were in another pack. Still, we swore to each other to stay together until death and if our fated mates showed up, we'd turn them down.

However, when Elikeh met his mate Xena, daughter of a neighbor alpha, he couldn't resist the pull, so he sacrificed our love without hesitation. With a heavy heart I watched as he marked Xena, the pain was unbearable. Distraught, I fled into the woods to lick my wounds, right into the arms of a breathtaking Adonis, Marvin Coovens, a filthy rich human on vacation. He offered me a shoulder to cry on and a shelter to process my grief.

I stayed with this billionaire for months and never before has anyone valued me so much, considered me the most important thing in their lives. Even Elikeh couldn't offer me this sense of security. Unfortunately, because of his possessive behavior, our ways parted, but not our feelings.

I went to live with a friend. My life was never the same without Marvin, this loss is worse than when Elikeh walk out on me. But then she fell in love with Marvin, drugged him and ended up pregnant. He said he can't remember having sex with her, but I didn't buy that. So I had to move on again and be all by myself.

But then my life takes a drastic turn. Alfa Alexander Bouvan of the Paxon pack, claims me as his mate and Luna. He convinced me that the werewolf laws require me to fulfill my mate's obligations.

I gave in because I was taught from childhood that werewolves can only survive in packs, I won't be able to live with humans for too long. So I became the Luna of the Paxon pack, but found out that a mate bond doesn't necessarily come with a strong sense of love, it's often just sexual lust. Alexander only feels the attraction, but he doesn't love me at all.

The mate bond that the Moon Goddess brings us is certainly not the same love as that of the heart. Our relationship deteriorates when Elikeh visits the Paxon pack and persuades Alexander to do a partner swap in bed. He still has a strong desire for me, but he cannot leave his Luna. In that moment I clearly experience the difference between animal lust and the extraordinary love and respect with which Marvin showered me.

And then I found out I'm pregnant. Xena discovered my pregnancy and gave it to the alphas. What she didn't count on was that Alex would claim the baby as his own and proudly announces this to the pack too. Xena, already so jealous of the love Elikeh still felt for me, the way he claimed me when we had sex together, wanted revenge. She went to Marvin explaining that I'm carrying his child.

Ultimately things heated up when Marvin arrived at the pack doors, challenging Alex for me. And at that moment it dawned on me that the time has come when I had to choose between my destined mate and the mate of my heart. But then again, is a rejection that simple for a werewolf and will alpha Alexander accept it unopposed?

Here's my story.